Hell's Brownies

Before I talk about the brownies, I need to talk about the process of making them. I was bored while Glenn was at the game so I decided to finally try the Jalapeño Brownies that I have been pondering lately. I ran to Safeway and picked up some Jalapeños and a Habañero to substitute for the Thai Chilis. Once I got home, I preheated the oven and started prepping. I washed the peppers and cut them into halves and then removed all the seeds... BARE HANDED! Nobody told me you should wear gloves or coat your hands in oil before you mess with peppers. I chopped away and ended up with some beautifully minced peppers. As I finished up with the recipe, my hands felt extra warm, an odd sensation to say the least. I put the brownies in the oven and forgot about everything until I tasted a bit of the ice cream that was being made in my new KitchenAid Ice Cream Maker Attachment, mind you, I used my finger. The first sensation I experienced was bliss, my ice cream was turning out incredibly, but then came the second feeling. Searing pain blazed across my tastebuds rendering me helpless and desperate for milk. After I guzzled my milk, I was awakened to the awful agony surging from my fingertips and radiating from my palms. I figured it would go away, but it didn't. After three hours I was worried, so I went online and found countless home remedies, none of which worked. I gave up trying and sucked it up. The next day, 24 hours later, my hands still hurt. They are still sensitive to extreme temperatures right now, 5 days later, but I can certainly handle that. Moral of the story? Glove your hands if you wanna mess with peppers.

All of that being said, I made the Jalapeño Brownies which were well received by my taste testers Glenn and Becky. I won't even go near them thanks to that awful experience. I also don't like peppers at all, so there's another reason I won't try them. The main problem with the recipe though is that Jalapeños are oily peppers and they made the brownies very difficult to cook, and even after 15 extra minutes of baking time, they were still severely undercooked. I would either use less next time, chop them coarser, or leave em in the oven even longer. If you are a fan of spicy and chocolate, I suggest you try this unexpected combination.

Hell's Brownies

1/2 cup butter
2/3 cup chocolate chips
4 large eggs
1/2 teaspoon salt
2 cups sugar
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1/4 cup all purpose flour
1/4 cup cocoa
5 large jalapeños, minced
6-8 thai chilis, minced (I used one Habañero in place of these)
3/4 cup walnuts (I didn't put these in, I hate nuts in brownies)

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F. Grease a 13 x 9 baking dish.

Melt butter and chocolate chips together then set aside.


Whisk or beat eggs with salt in a large bowl until foamy


Add sugar and vanilla and beat until well blended. Add chocolate butter mixture and stir just until combined. Add flour and cocoa and mix until almost blended.


Fold in the jalapeños, Thai chilis and nuts.


Transfer batter to prepared pan and bake until top forms a cracked cruse and the inside looks slightly moist, 30 to 35 minutes. (I did this for 50 minutes and it still wasn't done)


Cool and cut into squares.